The PurPose of Marriage - by Pastor Samm Adedewe

The day President Obama announced his belief in same-sex marriage; I puzzled whether marriage was a necessity or an option. 

Then there was the email from the Obama administration that included the following statement:
I’ve always believed that gay and lesbian Americans should be treated fairly and equally. 

I was reluctant to use the term marriage because of the very powerful traditions it evokes.

 And I thought civil union laws that conferred legal rights upon gay and lesbian couples were a solution.

The language struck me. Is marriage about the “powerful traditions,” or is it about “legal rights?” 

Where does love fit in? 

Most women, whether they will readily admit it or not, desire to be married. 

Many young girls have dreamed about the white dress and handsome groom since their earliest childhood. Even those with career or educational goals usually say that some day they would like to be married.

I have seen a lot of casualties in relationships and marriages, simply because they do not understand the purpose of marriage.

 The desire for marriage is high yet abused for lack of knowledge.

God established marriage as a covenant, not a contract (Malachi 2:14; Proverbs 2:16-17). 

It is important to understand the difference between these two. Three important differences exist:
1. A covenant is based on trust between parties. A contract is based on distrust.
2. A covenant is based on unlimited responsibility. A contract is based on limited liability.
3. A covenant cannot be broken if new circumstances occur. A contract can be voided by mutual consent.
So, what is the purpose of marriage?
Wherever purpose is not known, abuse is inevitable. The word abuse means “abnormal use.”
Abuse occurs whenever we use a thing contrary to its creator’s intention. In other
words, if we don’t understand the purpose of Marriage, or choose to ignore that purpose, we can’t do anything but unwittingly abuse it.
No matter how good our intentions may be, they are cancelled by ignorance. If the purpose of Marriage is not fully understood before entering into the covenant of Marriage, we may be sincere and committed toward our spouse or prospective spouse, but our sincerity and commitment cannot make up for lack of knowledge of Marriage’s purpose and in such a case abuse remains inevitable; we will misuse Marriage in an erratic and disorderly manner.
As Christians it is important for us to always remember that Marriage is not society’s idea, but God’s. Marriage is not a good idea, but a God idea. God is a God of purpose and He created everything for a purpose. Just because we don’t fully understand the purpose of a thing doesn’t make it purposeless. Ignorance of the purpose of Marriage does not cancel its purpose. Marriage exists for a distinct purpose in the mind of God to serve a greater purpose. To misuse Marriage means that we miss its intended purpose and thus use it for something other than what God had in mind when He ordained Marriage.
If you are not ready to fulfill this purpose, please do not say YES I DO or enter a relationship.
Let’s look at these purposes.
1. Partnership
One of the primary purposes of marriage is partnership. Or, I could more fittingly call it, companionship. When God created us, the scripture says, we were fearfully and wonderfully made, (See Psalms 139:14). Part of our makeup is; God DID NOT create us to be alone. He specifically wired us for companionship and declared this revelatory truth when He stated, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.” (See Genesis 2:18).
2. FOR MARITAL RELATIONS
2 Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband.
9 but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
1 COR. 7: 2 & 9.
One of the ways this partnership fortifies, invigorates, relaxes and pleasures the participants is through sexual relations.
Meditate on these facts; God engineered our body parts to fit perfectly together, (male to female). He programmed our bodies to respond to touch, taste, sight, sound and aroma. He installed in us the ability to become sexually aroused. Once aroused, our bodies automatically emit chemicals, aromas and sensitivities that heighten the sexual experience.
He wired us with capabilities to experience intense and immeasurable pleasure from foreplay and sexual intercourse. To top things off, He gave us the capacity to climax and enjoys orgasms.
In marriage it’s not SEX; it’s MAKING LOVE.
What’s the different: sex is lust and Sleeping with people for anything and with anybody.
But making love for NOTHING with PASSION, just for a man and a woman fulfilling God’s purpose.
Don’t go into a marriage you cannot SACRIFICE yourself!
LOVE is a SACRIFICE
Marital denials have caused a wreck of a HOLY WEDLOCK.
3. FOR CHILDBEARING - Gen. 4: 1
1 ¶ Now Adam knew Eve his wife, and she conceived and bore Cain, and said, "I have acquired a man from the LORD."
Genesis 4: 1
One purpose of marriage is to create a stable home in which children can grow and thrive. The best marriage is between two believers (2 Corinthians 6:14) who can produce godly offspring (Malachi 2:13-15).
In Malachi, God tells the Israelites that He will not accept their offerings because they have been unfaithful to the wives of their youth. This shows how much God cares about marriage being kept intact. Not only that, but He tells them He was seeking “godly offspring.”
This is a puzzling passage, and has been interpreted to mean
a) that godly offspring are the purpose of marriage;
b) that a good marriage between two godly people will mean that any children they have will tend to be godly as well;
c) God wanted the Israelites to be faithful to their wives instead of leaving them for foreign women who would produce for them ungodly offspring because of the idolatry of those nations; and
d) that God Himself was seeking His own offspring (the people) to exhibit godliness by their faithfulness. In any of these interpretations, we see a common theme: the children of faithful people will tend to be faithful too.
4. Purity
In His infinite wisdom, the Lord God purposed for marriage to protect us from the consequences and devastation of a society engrossed in moral chaos and sexual immorality. Meditate on His words carefully…
Hebrews 13:4 (The Message)
Honor marriage, and guard the sacredness of sexual intimacy between wife and husband. God draws a firm line against casual and illicit sex.
Make no mistake about it; God draws a firm line against casual and illicit sex. Marriage was and is the only pathway the Lord has ordained for a man and woman to engage in sexual relations. (See 1 Corinthians 7:2 and 1 Corinthians 6:9-11).
The Lord has drawn this clearly marked point of demarcation because of the disastrous effects of promiscuity and loose sexual morals. (e.g. birth defects, unplanned and unwanted pregnancies, fatherless children, paternity fraud, HIV/AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases, emotional torment, heartbreaking disappointment) and the list goes on.
A marriage union between an honorable man and a virtuous woman protects a man and woman from the impurities of casual and illicit sex.
5. FOR SELF CONTROL 1 Cor. 7: 5
self - control simply means to put one’s desire under control. Can you cut that deal in relationship or marriage?
Do you see why relationships and even so many marriages don’t work
wrong people all the time because of lack of purpose
6. FOR LOVE and SUBMISSION - Gen.3: 16
love for a man and submission for a woman
but in the world reverse is the case. SUBMISSION for a man and LOVE for a woman.

This is the issue - how many women are ready for a man to RULE THEIR WORLD! And how many men out there are ready to GIVE THEIR WORLD to a woman!
Let’s make a marriage purpose statement
A Marriage Purpose Statement is your conscious creation of who you want to become. It outlines your goals as a wife and as a husband.
Let me show you mine (just an extract):
I will be attentive to (name), to our friendship, romance and partnership in parenting, and to the state of our marriage.
I will admire and appreciate who she is, all she contributes, and the ways she is growing and being challenged in life.

I will take responsibility for my attitudes and approach to life in submission to the Lord and in partnership with (name).
I will remain open to growing, learning and investing as the Holy Spirit leads me.
I will draw near to God and (name) as we navigate each day and every season.

For Spiritual Guidance and counseling and prayer, pls. call Pastor Samm on 07063093944 or send SMS or email: pastorsamm2013@gmail.com
I love you always